"You have to stop hoping to be unemployed"

MyFella has told me time and time again.

You see, on February 15 my latest boss told me "You're not the guy for the job." He followed that up with "None of my bosses think you're the guy for the job." But in a sweeping moment of his magnanimous self, he's going to give me 90 days to "prove otherwise."

So now we're over 45 days into it, and I pretty much spend every one of them just wishing he would let me go. Give me a couple of weeks severance (or more) and unemployment. I'll be fine, at least for a while.

Yea yea, I know. Times are hard and there are people who can't find jobs anywhere. I understand. I know it's better to have a job with a boss I hate than no job at all. I get that.

I know the last time I was unemployed, it took me 6 months to find a job, and this one was it.

Still. I'm not exactly inspired.

At different times in the last 45+ days, my sleeping has been whack, I grind my teeth, I am completely nervous all day. I don't handle stress well.

I really think he would have done me a favor to just let me go, rather than leave me wondering every day and every week if I've done good enough to stay a little longer.

Ugh. Hate it.